Struggle- That phase of life

A nobody doing nothing to be anybody and still hoping to be somebody!

That’s exactly who or what I am.
I want this! I have always wanted it. I including my peers, teachers, friends and family also agree I posses the skills and I am fit for the job. Yet I am failing so hard to give the final push to seal the deal.

I should be studying and working out but I find it so comforting to read or write or simply sleep away my day! I am not this inactive, lazy person. Trust me I am not. I am just immensely mentally tired!

I have been struggling to find someone or something to motivate me untill recently when I realised I got to be my own light.

Just the realisation is not enough and therefore I am hoping that some change is brought soon enough.

Recently met a few old friends. They have been a breath of fresh air. Lets see if I can leave all the mistakes of last year behind to start afresh. I am not regretful as such of all that has happened, or I deliberately did. It taught me something and molded me into something that I am starting to like. Life is not about the destination, its about the journey.

Still I have to restart. I have to pull up my socks and try my best for one last time. My passion has a time frame as it turns out. To add to the already high level of stress is the fact that the man I love also wishes the same for me,and I can’t have him till I get my childhood dream.

Plenty related to one thing, I have to give my best for once. I haven’t tried enough I know and so I wish to change that. If I fail after giving my best I will accept my fate but not before.

I am taking it as my struggling phase, I am hoping for light at the end of the tunnel. I do not pray for any achievement, I pray for strength to work harder and courage strong enough not to let me give up.


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